Parents and Discipleship

I have been a youth pastor for over 20 years.  When I was in my 20’s, and single, my arrogance was shameful. I thought I had the “game plan” and that all the parents had to do was drop off their kids at church and I would return them loving Jesus more than anyone in their family.  As I have gotten older and God has blessed me with a godly bride and 4 kids, my approach has changed drastically.

 First, I see the need for humbleness in all phases of ministry but especially when dealing with parents and intentionally involving them in ministry at church and at home. I didn’t realize how little I knew about discipleship until I got married and had children. (I am not saying getting married and having children is a prerequisite to understanding true discipleship. I am simply stating God unveiled to me glaring weaknesses in MY understanding and approach to discipleship through my family.)

Second, my focus has shifted more from trying to understand youth culture to better understanding God’s Word. Youth culture changes so rapidly that even youth can’t keep up with it anymore. The unchanging, solid-rock foundation of God’s Word is what the only enteral part of their being (their souls) truly craves. I still examine the culture, but not with the intensity I once did.

Lastly, I understand that I have to give up a few popular things in the ministry in order to better equip parents to disciple their children at home. This part has not been easy. The time constraints families have on them today are tremendous.  We have had to cut back on a few things in order to allow a time where we can have the most parents available so they can be better equipped to disciple at home. This is such a passion of mine that I am currently writing my D. Min. dissertation on “Equipping Parents to Fulfill their Role in Biblical Discipleship.”      

The biggest thing I have learned in teaching 3 weeks of this 10 week class is how excited and hungry the parents are to be better equipped to biblically lead at home. I gave them a questionnaire to gage their competence and understating of in-home discipleship during the first class and one of the questions that we asked was:  “Have you ever had training or a class that taught you how to disciple your children?” An abysmal 2% said yes. This is an indictment on our church and shows our failure to address one of the most glaring problems in the church today. Parents need the church to step up and at least offer some equipping in the area of in-home discipleship. To not do this means we are not fulfilling the role of the pastors to equip the saints as stated in Ephesians 4:11-12.